In Memory Of

Mrs. Betty Lane Howard Phillips

February 6, 1917 - August 27, 2010

My mom called me late Friday night to ask me if I would be willing to speak at the funeral. I was shocked, but I knew if I could get over my fears of public speaking and the anxiety of her loss I wanted to do it. I sat down on Sunday evening just before bed and I wrote the following:

"Today we are here to honor a true Southern Belle. And when most people think of the word Southern Belle, I imagine they think of Scarlett, from Gone With The Wind. But I do not.

I think of Mrs. Betty Lane Howard Phillips. She was a daughter, a sister and mother to Bengie and Chris. She was a Mother In Law to Fred and my Mom. She was Nana to: Tasha, Mary, Annabelle and Baby King.

And she was Mrs. Phillips to: Shane, Shannon, Bryce, Owen and myself.

I first met Mrs. Phillips in 1985 when I was five years old. My mom told me before I went inside to met her, no matter what, I better be good and what ever I do, I had better not embarrass her. Even at five years old I knew what that meant! I knew she must be VERY SPECIAL!
 
From that day forward, Mrs. Phillips always treated me as her very own granddaughter. And she never treated me or referred to me as a stepchild.

She and I had so many wonderful talks together and I could sit for hours listening to her stories of growing up in Fort Mitchell. She told her grandchildren about being born in a log cabin, that her Daddy owned a General Store where he sold ice. And she told us her four brothers taught her how to drive a car. She shared old black and white pictures and told us about her days spent with her Cousin Anne and how they would go on double dates in their twenties.

And she ALWAYS started her stories off the same way each time, by saying, "Well back in my day."

Mrs. Phillips loved every person who is here today. She loved us all! And the truth is, anyone who met her loved her just as much. And I think we all could agree to this:

She is the nicest, sweetest, person you will ever meet. She will take care of you, love you and feed you until you want to pop. And just when you pop, she will bring you a big bowl of ice cream with chocolate sauce!

Mrs. Phillips loved to care for everyone. She was always giving and doing for others and even in her last years, when she wasn't her strongest, she still wanted to take care of us all.

She's the best host I've ever known! She gave the tightest hugs and I loved the way she always smelled of Chanel #5 and face powder.

She was so proud of us all, for whatever big or small things we had done.

She has been a huge inspiration to me and I hope I could be half as good as her one day.
 
Mrs. Phillips will always live on in my memories. I already miss her dearly and a little piece of me is in heave above today.

I am so happy my Mom and Bengie met, so I could have a Nana in my life - A True Southern Belle."

In Loving Memory of Mrs. Phillips:

August 31, 2010

I really wish I had been able to get to her sooner.  I know she would have loved Owen and I'm sorry she never got to meet him.  She called me back in early May from Magnolia Manner and she was so happy.  She was excited about all the activities and a few days later I received the last letter from her in the mail.  I kept that letter by my bed side for the past 3 months and I looked at every night before bed, saying to myself, I need to write her a note, she would love that.  I regret never getting the chance to mail her back, but I know she knew I loved her with all my heart.  So this makes me think today, about all the friends and family that we have and how we get so busy and easily forget to tell them we love them.  We just always think they'll be around especially a grandparent who has always been in your life.  I knew I'd miss her, but this loss has effected me more than I ever could have imagined.  But time heals all things and I know she wouldn't want me to worry for her or to be sad.  So I will wipe the tears today and get dressed and put on some make up and something nice, that's what she would do.